Our Journey

2002 Uterine Fibroid Surgery #1

2003 1st consult with an RE, you know, just in case

2003 Got Married (at 37 (me) & 34 (DH) years old)

2003/2004 Naturally conceived pregnancies BFPs #1, #2, & #3 and miscarriages #1, #2, #3

2005 Uterine Fibroid Surgery #2

2005 IVF #1, BFN #1

2005 IUIs #1 and #2, just because, BFN #2 & #3

2005 FET from IVF #1, BFN #4

2006 Exploratory surgery to remove scar tissue from fibroid sugery #2

2006 IVF #2 (w PGD), BFP #4

2006 Emergency cerclage for IC @ 16w6d (5 months + 1 week of complete bed rest at home ensues)

2007 Our son is born @ 38w by scheduled c-section

2007 IVF #3 for baby #2, BFN #5

2007 IVF #4, BFP #5, miscarriage #4

2008 IVF #5, BFP #6, miscarriage #5

2008 IVF #6, BFP #7, miscarriage #6

2008 DE IVF #7, BFN #6

2009 DEFET #8, cancelled, embryos don't thaw

2010 Decide to adopt domestically

12.17.10 Profile is live with our agency

November 2011 Consult with RE re: donated embryo cycle

Early January 2012 Cleared to proceed with deFET

January 2012 Freeze our profile

1.20.12 deFET begins
2.12.12 eSET of one compacted morula
2.22.12 BFN

3.23.12 deFET #2 begins
4.14.12 transfer 3 embryos (1-8 cell, 1-5 cell, 1-4 cell)
4.22.12 + HPT
4.24.12 Beta #1 = 48.4
4.26.12 Beta #2 = 125.7
4.30.12 Beta #3 = 777.8
5.11.12 1st U/S - Singleton!
7.12.12 It's a Boy!
12.26.12 C-section: Baby G is born, 9#5oz, 20.5"




I will NOT abandon this space. Just knowing that it is here as a touchstone is comforting. I enjoy the writing process. I need a place to gather my thoughts and, frankly, I appreciate every single comment. I share things here that I can’t/won’t/don’t on FB or anywhere else. As the banner says, My place […]

She Responded

I posted recently that my mom sent a letter to my birth mother. Since my last few attempts at corresponding with my birth mother (including the floral arrangement I sent her for her birthday in April) have gotten nary a response, I wasn’t sure if she would respond to my mom. But, she did:

Back Story

Not fair to leave you hanging but the back story to my re-involvement with my parents isn’t all that grand. My mother was in the hospital a couple of months ago to treat a recurrence of diverticulitus. She was very sick and in a lot of pain. I believe that this particular bout was severe […]

Plague of 2015, a 50b50 Fail, Birth Parent News

I am taking my 50 before 50 seriously and wanted to get this posted by last Friday in order to fulfill my #30 entry of posting at least once/wk. At the point I hit publish on my last post, the virus must have already been working its way through my system as by a week […]


The phobia I don’t have. Happy Friday the 13th!

So many thoughts rattling around in my head, each deserving of a thoughtful post, but where is the time to write? I am happy to be here, in this space, in this moment, while G is napping and my older son is at Lego day camp. […]


It has hurt me on some primal level that my parents didn’t even acknowledge my birthday. It’s a feeling I can’t seem to shake, being abandoned by two sets of parents. Me, the parentless child.

Kinship is the only thing that makes me feel better…knowing that I am not alone. It isn’t even the awareness […]

The Haps

A mobile toddler has dramatically changed my ‘free’ time and I have much less time to think, sit, and write in-depth posts on the various topics rattling around in my brain. Still, so much to say, so little time.

In these intervening weeks between posts, I turned forty-eight (48!). Setting aside the fact that my […]

We’re Melting

It is going to be 102 degrees here today and warmer tomorrow. This is record breaking heat even for Southern California for mid-May. We’ve determined that G gets a heat rash (legs, arms, torso) when the temperatures get over 90 degrees which they have been on/off since April. I’m still not sure what the most […]

The Tall Man has the Book

The letter was delivered to my birth mother yesterday. Now, I wait.

A friend asked me if I was nervous and I actually hadn’t considered how I was feeling. Nervous? No. Hopeful? No. I told her that I have no expectations, but that’s not entirely true, either. I guess I mostly feel frustrated, disappointed that […]

The Question of Why

I received this question via email and I answered directly but I thought it was worth posting here since I know there are others with donor gamete conceived children who read this blog who might be curious (in addition to those who have adopted and those who are adoptees themselves):

“Can I ask […]