Not fair to leave you hanging but the back story to my re-involvement with my parents isn’t all that grand. My mother was in the hospital a couple of months ago to treat a recurrence of diverticulitus. She was very sick and in a lot of pain. I believe that this particular bout was severe […]
It has hurt me on some primal level that my parents didn’t even acknowledge my birthday. It’s a feeling I can’t seem to shake, being abandoned by two sets of parents. Me, the parentless child.
Kinship is the only thing that makes me feel better…knowing that I am not alone. It isn’t even the awareness […]
Tomorrow night is the open house at my older son’s school. Family and friends are invited to attend. The children’s work will be on display to new/incoming/prospective families as well as to parents to see all they’ve accomplished. I cannot believe that in 3 weeks my son will have completed first grade. A second grader? […]
I have come a long way toward accepting the estrangement from my parents (and, vis a vis, my sister and her family). Fixing it is not a possibility given the mental health issues with my mother and my father’s dependence (post stroke) on her. It isn’t even so much about managing it anymore as are […]
This is not the post I envisioned for what was otherwise a lovely Christmas holiday. My mother certainly ruined my Christmas eve but as I didn’t have to see her today and I hope not for many months, we had a great day.
And, while my husband said he thinks it is fear, not hate, […]
I decided that I would arrive just late and leave early to the memorial. Depending on how it went, we’d go, as a family, to the dinner following. On my way there, I called my childhood friend and told her I needed a mantra. (As an aside, I feel juvenile and not like the mature, […]
This was my sister’s FB status this morning:
“Happy Birthday to my mom, an amazing artist, totally helpful Grandma and the most supportive fabulous mother anyone could ask for!”
I can’t help but feel sad for myself, this utter dichotomy in our relationship to and with the same woman.
Tomorrow is my mother’s birthday. Growing up, my mom made it a big deal that we celebrate her birthday and their wedding anniversary. She would actually get angry if we forgot their anniversary. I remember when I was in college her berating me for not acknowledging their anniversary and wondering why it was such a […]
Merriam-Webster’s definition of estrange include:
1. to turn away in feeling or affection; make unfriendly or hostile; alienate the affections of 2. to remove to or keep at a distance
Yep, that about sums it up.
Even though my dad came to my older son’s 6th birthday party this year and even though […]
It has been revelatory, finally finding the right therapist. That she is also an adult adoptee and has spent the majority of her career working with those of us who also are, provides a kind of illumination that I simply don’t think another therapist could. I liken it to infertility; many in our lives can […]