pain management for arthritis

Our Journey

2002 Uterine Fibroid Surgery #1

2003 1st consult with an RE, you know, just in case

2003 Got Married (at 37 (me) & 34 (DH) years old)

2003/2004 Naturally conceived pregnancies BFPs #1, #2, & #3 and miscarriages #1, #2, #3

2005 Uterine Fibroid Surgery #2

2005 IVF #1, BFN #1

2005 IUIs #1 and #2, just because, BFN #2 & #3

2005 FET from IVF #1, BFN #4

2006 Exploratory surgery to remove scar tissue from fibroid sugery #2

2006 IVF #2 (w PGD), BFP #4

2006 Emergency cerclage for IC @ 16w6d (5 months + 1 week of complete bed rest at home ensues)

2007 Our son is born @ 38w by scheduled c-section

2007 IVF #3 for baby #2, BFN #5

2007 IVF #4, BFP #5, miscarriage #4

2008 IVF #5, BFP #6, miscarriage #5

2008 IVF #6, BFP #7, miscarriage #6

2008 DE IVF #7, BFN #6

2009 DEFET #8, cancelled, embryos don't thaw

2010 Decide to adopt domestically

12.17.10 Profile is live with our agency

November 2011 Consult with RE re: donated embryo cycle

Early January 2012 Cleared to proceed with deFET

January 2012 Freeze our profile

1.20.12 deFET begins
2.12.12 eSET of one compacted morula
2.22.12 BFN

3.23.12 deFET #2 begins
4.14.12 transfer 3 embryos (1-8 cell, 1-5 cell, 1-4 cell)
4.22.12 + HPT
4.24.12 Beta #1 = 48.4
4.26.12 Beta #2 = 125.7
4.30.12 Beta #3 = 777.8
5.11.12 1st U/S - Singleton!
7.12.12 It's a Boy!
12.26.12 C-section: Baby G is born, 9#5oz, 20.5"

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fFN Result

Ugh, it came back positive.  Within a couple minutes of the result posting to my medical record my phone was ringing.  It was my MFM, even though it is almost 9 PM here.  She is concerned that the result is a false positive given the transvaginal ultrasound I had yesterday at my OBs office.  That u/s was done using gel on the transducer and I know that anything in the vagina within 24 hours of the fFN test can cause a false positive.  However, now that it is positive, we have to act as if it is really positive.

Therefore, I will have the first course of steroid injections tomorrow and Friday and we’ll take it from there.  Honestly, it is hard enough walking around with a 1.2cm cervix but to have that plus a positive fFN is almost too much for me.  I was so stressed going into my appointment today, with a knot in my stomach that I still have.

I am worried and afraid, afraid of the unknown.  A planned c-section is calm in comparison to going into labor unexpectedly or having my water break where ever I am.  I am just beyond freaked out, now, that I won’t know what to do or won’t do it in time or that we’ll move into an emergency situation.

Ugh, I am scared.

16 comments to fFN Result

  • Jen

    Oh dear, I wish I had some words of wisdom for you. I’m sorry you are feeling scared, however, everything you have reported from your MFM indicates that this pregnancy will continue even with these results. I know this wasn’t the news you wanted to hear though. I will be thinking of you and hope you can breath and try get through this as best you can.

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  • Sarah

    (((((((hugs)))))))))
    My boys came at 28.5 and are nearly 2. 29 weeks is early, but 98% survival rate is REAL. I hope your body holds out, but if not, remember my fat and sassy little men! ((((((hugs)))))))

  • You don’t seem like someone to scare easily, so when you say you’re scared — argh, my heart goes out to you. Thinking of you, your baby and your family a lot right now!

  • Meg

    Calm thoughts coming your way. To date you have worked on one day at a time this is no different. Hunker down and hold on for the rest of the ride. Still hoping for several more weeks, one day at a time,

  • I think it’s a false positive too; but you have to treat it like it is. It’s early, yes. And it’s not ideal, definitely. Keep breathing. Rest. It’s going to be okay, ultimately, sweetie. You are at a gestation where there is every indication that your son will be okay, especially with steroid injections.

    Breathe. Hang in there. I am thinking about you and sending you peace and love.

  • Anna

    Also sending lots of good and peaceful thoughts your way. It makes total sense to be scared and worry about things that could happen. However, it is something you can deal with and you will do it well. You are in good hands, you know you can trust your healthcare team and that you have been doing everything you can throughout too. All any of us can do, when pregnant, is deal as well as we can with what comes our way, when and how they arrive is often not within our control or what we would choose. Beyond freaked out sounds like a normal response to your results but that doesn’t mean that you won’t deal well with what happens whenever the time comes. I hope that the shots go well,x

  • I was at a 1.2cm cervix at 20 weeks and held on for 8 weeks. Your cervix that short doesn’t necessarily imply impending doom. In 8 weeks, you’ll be 37 weeks. Sending good vibes your way.

  • oh you have every right to be scared. I really hope that this is just a formality and you keep going merrily along. I was wondering if the MFM had another look at the cervix and came up with a better number than yesterday?
    please breathe deep, watch a feel good movie and snuggle with your guys. Sending you love and strength!
    xoxo

  • Dianne S

    I gave birth to my son at 28 weeks and 4 days. It was out of the blue and terrifying (midnight trip to the hospital while my husband was at work, transfer by ambulance to a hospital with a better NICU and then a c section, all by 6 am) but he is doing great. He is still in the hospital but he is gaining weight (up to 5lbs 5 oz after being born at 2 lbs 12 oz) and making good progress. I hope you will have many more more weeks and make it to your c section date. I share just to say even early your baby has very good chances of being ok.

  • Oh wow, that’s tough news. Sending strength and peaceful thoughts your way. Hoping it’s a false positive!

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