For some unknown reason, we stopped swaddling baby boy weeks ago. I’m not sure why, but it probably had to do with him screaming at first in the swaddle. Something had to give around here as the days were a blur of feeding every hour to three hours, and not much napping, and me dreading the overnights.
I checked Harvey Karp’s Happiest Baby on the Block book out from our local library and began reading in earnest last night. We used his techniques with our first son, so I was aware of the 5 Ss and the 4th trimester (which is a VERY helpful concept for a new parent and even an old timer who needs a refresher). What was missing was how to use all 5 Ss succcesfully together.
After another rough day yesterday with near constant feeding and not a lot of sleeping, I was bound and determined to have a better day today. Rereading the book reminded me that there is an order to the 5 Ss and I started using them this morning. After baby boy ate and was showing signs of sleepiness, I swaddled him, shushed him, rocked him a bit in my arms, and put him in the swing. He did not squawk and instead slept 2 hours. When he awoke, I rinsed and repeated and he is sleeping again.
I feel like such an idiot. I could have helped myself (and him) immensely by just doing some parenting homework. It is way too early to say that we’ve turned a corner (and I am still worried with how much he is eating daily (4 oz of combined breast milk and formula, 7-8 times per 24 hours)), but he is not spitting it back up violently and he has a specific cry that says, “hey, I’m still hungry over here” if we try to shortchange him an ounce. I have heard that formula stretches their stomachs in a way that breast milk does not, so now that we are on this ride, we will stay on it and see how we do.
I weighed him this morning and he was 10#10 oz, so he has gained a pound in 8 days. It is on the high side of newborn weight gain ranges but since he was a big baby to start, I am trying not to worry.
I am hopeful that these techniques will work more often than not as I have shed a lot of tears over not being better able to soothe this baby. I feel like such a neophyte. I have as many questions of other mothers as I did the first time. Like, where is your newborn sleeping? How is his/her day organized? If you are supplementing, what formula has worked for you (our attempts at switching from the exorbitantly expensive Enfamil Newborn 2 oz ready to eat nursettes have failed. Too much gas, explosive poop)? If you are using a powder, how do you mix it up (our experience with powder has not been great but it is the most economical way to go).
He is 4 weeks today! The time does fly and I am savoring these moments. It is easier to do when I have had some rest and there is a light at the end of the tunnel (that is not an oncoming train).
Very happy to hear that thsoe techniques are working for you! I do not have a baby so I dont have a ton of advice, but i want t tell you about a resource. When I was in grad school I did an evaluation of the period of purple crying, which is a parent education program to prevent shaken baby syndrome. No, i don not thinkyou are going to shake your baby! But it hs some helpful tips about what is normal for infant crying and how to soothe a baby: http://www.purplecrying.info/
I feel like I should be taking notes! I hope you’re finally in your groove!
Hi there,
I’m not sure if I’ve commented yet, but I’ve been a lurker for a few months. I very much enjoy your blog! I wanted to say that my son, who is now 4, was almost identical to what you describe. ALWAYS hungry, eating way more than I thought reasonable for such a tiny baby – at least as much as your little one. My SIL who has now has 5 children and my sister who now has 2, and both grandmothers could not believe how much he consumed. I was worried, especially since it was my first time at the rodeo. He was also reflux-y and eventually was on meds but I’m not sure if he truly needed them. I was desperate, anxiety ridden and sleep deprived and just wanted him to feel better. All of this improved dramatically by 3-4 months (the end of the fourth trimester!) so I suspect he needed to grow and mature. He was never a good napper until he went to one nap a day but oh my goodness, his appetite was just off the charts his entire first year. I believe it was around 10 months he was consuming about 32-40 ounces of formula, 3 solid meals and 2 small snacks a day. Plus water/juice sippies. He was always and still is tall, now he’s just skinnier. And lives on milk, goldfish and air! He ate more at a year than he does now. All this to say – and I know you’re an experienced mama – it does get so.much.better.
I’m so glad you reread that book. It was a life saver for us.
I loved that book as well. I actually watched the 20 minute DVD version and it was perfect. The next book I recommend that you pick up is Twelve Hours by Twelve Weeks. Oh my. I was a game changer for us. I can’t recommended it enough. I went from getting up three times a night to feed SIX OUNCES at a shot to a ten-month-old to him sleeping 12-13 hours uninterrupted. I though that the sleep fairy came and left an amazing gift.
He’s reverted back to getting up to eat now that we are working through an ear infection and some heavy duty antibiotics, but next week, we’ll be right back on this program.
Some babies have growth spurts that last longer, other just eat a whole lot more… My second boy gained two pounds in less than ten days, his first ten days. He was constantly on the breast, and I have to say he never had any problem suckling, he owns a very efficient motor pump alright and he ain’t afraid of using it. I was nursing every 2-3 hours, since he would only cry when he was hungry. Funny thing, now he only cries when he is sleepy. That doesn’t mean he is a stellar sleeper though…
I’d say that as long as your tiny boy is happy, content, growing as he should, producing an appropriate number of wet and soiled nappies, than you should change absolutely nothing and stop worrying about feeding him too much. They do have an innate hunger regulating mechanism, most of the children have, and it works quite well during the first years. It’s after that that it gets messed up.
Glad to hear the 5 Ss work for you. Rest is always welcome.
Tiny toes… They are magic, tiny toes, they are.
Those are truly beautiful feet! Just looking at them makes me feel all baby-positive, when my experiences left me a little less than that. I’m so glad those techniques worked, isn’t it wonderful when something works. Don’t feel bad about not discovering them before, it could have been much worse (I still don’t have the fix and she’s 2.5). I hope that you both continue to get the relief of some peace and a break from feeding.x