It is mid-day on Thursday and not a thing has been packed. I was supposed to be going out with friends for a moms night out tonight, but cancelled as this is really our only time to pack, see what we have/don’t and for me to plan my day tomorrow as we fly out first thing Saturday morning.
I decided it was probably best to take an ativan this morning to see how it made me feel. Anyone who’s ever taken it usually reports it’s effect in the same way: it takes the edge off, and, yes, that it does. Of course, now I just want to take a nap, but that’s good to know, too.
Which brings me to the purpose of this post. I am afraid to fly. At best, the EMDR therapy has gotten me to a place where I was able to purchase our flights and have not been in a panic this week like I usually would. It doesn’t mean that I’m not without nerves or a knot in my stomach or on the verge of tears even if I am able to keep them at bay. All of these things are huge. HUGE! But, I am on edge.
If you would like to support me getting on this flight, making it to Portland, and returning home, there is a way that you can help. I believe in the power of collective consciousness and if you would track our flight as we are making our way from LA to Portland and back, I would sure appreciate it. I hesitate posting the flight # here because, as a phobic, I am sure someone with bad intentions would get a hold of it and doom our plane, but if you’d like the flight info, email me at email@example.com and I will provide it to you. There are many real time flight tracking sites, but the one I use is FlightAware.
However hokey you may think it is, should I become overcome with anxiety on the flight, just knowing that there are real people (whose names I can call to mind) tracking our flight will bring me calm.